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This is where the headline goes
Updated March 11, 2003
M&Ms - I LOVE 'EM
What’s not to love? Milk chocolate covered in a crispy crunchy candy shell.
I especially love the peanut M&Ms, they’ve been around long enough that they
are universally low tech.
They preceded the Internet and PCs – I think they’ve
even been around longer than touchtone phones. And although they have nice
shiny outside coats, they have always been ‘earth toned’ colors. That is
until just a few years ago. A few years ago, they introduced Blue M&Ms.
Now I don’t eat blue M&Ms and I recommend that you don’t either. First of all
the blue ones don’t match the other colors in the pack. Secondly, I don’t
really think that they are M&Ms at all. I think that they are Smurf Turds.
That’s right, I said it, Smurf Turds. The little blue droppings of little
blue Smurfs.
You see, they break into the factory at night, and they drop their little
excrements right into your unsuspecting bag of confections. And the supposed
blue Peanut M&Ms? Those are little Smurf eggs. Yup, they sneak into the
factory and they breed like rabbits.
Then they lay their eggs in the bags; the little
Smurfs hatch in your bag; eat the M&Ms that you would otherwise purchase; and
drop turds all over the place.
It would be completely disgusting, if it weren’t for the protective candy coat
on the M&Ms. I recommend that when you come across the blue plain or peanut
M&Ms, you quickly throw them out and don’t risk the temptation of eating them.
But of course I could be wrong.
Billo
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