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They Were all Hopped Up!

I was a big cartoon fan as a kid
Updated January 15, 2004

I used to watch a lot of cartoons left over from the 1960s. While some 'toons like Speed Racer went on to become timeless classics, there were many others that did not. Here I’m specifically talking about those second rate cartoon Super Heroes from the 1960s. Growing up I realized that all of those heroes had something in common. They had serious chemical dependencies.

I’m not kidding here. Remember Mighty Mouse? He used to pop mega dosages of vitamins in order to get his amazing strength. No exercise; no pain – no gain, just the 1960s version of steroids. He took the quick and easy route.

And there were others too: Ashamed of his addiction, Under Dog used to hide pills in his ring. But he was just the tip of the iceberg. Does anyone remember Super Fly? He was an ordinary housefly until he put on his tripping, psychedelic Super Glasses. Then he could fly faster than the speed of light.

Even Buggs Bunny flirted with super hero-dom when he got a hold of some super carrots. Fortunately for Buggs his supply ran out before his addiction got out of control. Although, for years rumors persisted on the Warner Brother back lot alternately saying that Daffy Duck either lead an emotionally charged intervention or that he was actually Buggs’ supplier.

Then there was Super Chicken. Now, Super Chicken was out of the closet as far as his chemical addiction was concerned. Super Chicken’s "Companion", Fred, would help him mix his Super Sauce Elixir that changed him from an ordinary chicken into Super Chicken. Super Chicken’s secret identity was Henry Cabot Henhaus III, the richest chicken in the world. Always the class act, Super Chicken could be seen drinking his Super Sauce from a martini glass while wearing a smoking jacket.

And of course there is everyone’s favorite steroid pumping sailor – Popeye. Your basic meek and mild sailorman who gets pushed around just long enough for the old ‘roid-rage to kick in. About the only words that you can understand from this hopped-up bilge rat are in his final warning: "That’s alls I can stands and I can’t stands no more!!" Careful Olive, drastic mood swings are a warning sign.

But my all time favorite chemically addicted Super Hero of the 1960s had to be Tobor the 8th Man. "Tobor" was robot spelled backward. This Japanese import cartoon was about a police detective who was killed in the line of duty. A genius scientist took his remains and made him into a crime fighting robot. Now you know where the idea for RoboCop came from. Tobor demonstrated his chemical addiction quite dramatically. Whenever he needed a hit he would smoke special nuclear cigarettes that he kept hidden in his belt.

But now we know that television and video games have no effect on children. It’s just a coincidence.

What do you think?

Billo
Find out more about Underdog here.

Find out more about all your favorite cartoons here.

Mad props to Chris Halber for reminding me of Marine Boy. Marine Boy used to chew "OxyGum" so that he could breath underwater. Oxygum... Oxycotyn... hey, what's the difference? This dude was swimming around the ocean having hallucinations of a hottie mermaid that looked like Jeannette B.

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