Friday, 9/28/2001 - Random Thoughts…
Real quick, here's what's on my mind:
How desperate have you ever been for a cup of coffee? Let me tell you
something. Did you know that the most expensive coffee in the world is
called Kopi
Luwak and it retails in the United States for about $300 per pound.
This is supposed to be one really good cup of mud. Mrs. Olson would wet her
pants to get a cup of this java.
What makes this café so good is supposedly the unique way in which it is
processed. Some crazy, tree-dwelling cat called the palm civet eats whole,
ripe coffee beans. The beans pass through the cat almost completely
unaltered. It’s then some poor schlub’s job to collect up these beans and get
them ready for shipping.
I’ve never had the coffee, but of course you realize that if I were ever
offered a cup I would eagerly take it. I’m rather adventuresome like that.
But what I want to know is how desperate for a cup of jamoke was the first
person who tried this? I mean really.. You’re sitting there in Indonesia,
just dying for a cup of joe, and you can’t find a bean anywhere. The only
place you can find any is in your Garfield’s litter box. How bad did that guy
want that cup? I mean we’re talking about a serious caffeine addiction here.
And then after he went ahead and tried it, he had to convince someone else to
try it. “Hey Bob, try this coffee, I made it from my cat’s droppings. - No
really, it’s good!” I don’t think so.
Will those little wax paper disposable potty protectors that they provide in
the Men’s Room protect my butt from getting anthrax?
We got a Guinea Pig a few weeks ago. His name is Spanky. Exactly what method
is used to determine the sex of a Guinea Pig is a mystery to me. Spanky’s
previous owner told us his sex and as far as I’m concerned, that’s good
enough. As long as Spanky respects my privacy, I’ll respect his. Now for
whatever reason, any time I talk about Spanky, I have a block regarding his
species. I’ve called him: a dog; a ferret; a squirrel; a rat; a gerbil; and
even an iguana. When the chips are down, I can’t seem to remember
“Guinea Pig”. Anyhow, I’m always looking for an angle, and I think I have one
now with this thing. I’ve started feeding him Tea Leaves. If this works out,
I might be selling $300 per pound tea in the next couple of months. Wish
me luck!
Rub a Dub Dub. If you came home and found your butcher in your bathtub with
your baker and candlestick maker, would you have written a children’s song
about it - or called the police? I think we live in a much different world
than our grandparents. Get the full story on these three perverts
here.
Well those are just some random thoughts for today.
