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Michael Saint / Archangel or Fraud?
You know, I thought that I had listened during religion class. And I thought
that I understood this thing correctly. You’re born; you live a good life;
you die; and you go to Heaven. You join the billions of other souls who have
come before you along with the choirs of angels and enjoy the splendor that
is the eternal afterlife. If you were exceptionally good as a human you may
even be given the title of Saint. But you don’t become an angel.
Angels are heavenly bodies that are different from humans. They never were
human, and they never will be. They are often used by God as messengers and
they’ve been around since before God created the universe separated the
heavens from the Earth and turned on time. Don’t even get me started with
that one- when God turned on time. Obviously once God turned on time he
realized that she was on a schedule. That’s why the whole rest of creation
only took up seven days. But now we’re getting off the track, we were talking
about angels.
If I remember the story correctly, it was the Archangel Lucifer, who grew
weary of all the spoils of paradise and decided to try to strike out on his
own. Now I won’t try to pretend to know what paradise was like back then, or
even that I know what it is like now, but I suppose it was different then than
it is now. Otherwise, if it was so great, how could Lucifer convince enough
angels to side with him and attempt to take on God for control of the
as-of-yet-uncreated universe?
I know this story is getting a little long winded so just stick with me for
another minute. Apparently before there ever was an Adam or Eve; before there
ever was a Garden of Eden; before God separated the Heavens from the Earth and
brought forth from the Earth all manner of beast; there was a battle in Heaven
for ultimate control. God’s armies led by Michael the Archangel defeated and
destroyed Lucifer’s armies and drove them into Hell. Which I suppose God
created once Lucifer’s armies were defeated. I just can’t imagine that she
created Hell at the same time that he created Heaven, because what use would
she have had for it at the time?
Alright now, this whole diatribe was a set us up for my question about Michael
the Archangel. While I was at church this weekend I picked up a little
booklet about Michael, and in the booklet he was referred to as Saint Michael
the Archangel. Now you say, “What? How can this be!? I thought angels were
angels and Saints were good humans. How could Michael be Saint Michael the
Archangel?” Now you understand my quandary.
So if anyone can explain, and I’m willing to listen to lame guesses here, how
Michael can be both a Saint and an Angel; I’m anxious to know. Just enter
your answer here in the guestbook
. No Church bashing please. Moronic
guesses are encouraged, but biased bashing will be edited.
Billo
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